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Friday, July 03, 2009

it just occured to me why i enjoyed doing the lit and chem exam this afternoon.
the real reason has always been in my subconscious, i only couldnt/ didnt identify it earlier..
since the past few months, maybe even stretching way back to last year, i feel as though my mind has been cruising, on auto-pilot.
my brain feels so, so empty..
i havent been processing much thought, i was filled with dread for fear of having lost my habit to think, and hence write.
my inefficiency during KI lessons has shot my confidence, say ego if you will!
i am not the smartest nor brightest person i know that, but i've always took pride in being a thinker.
took too many bullets....
lit and chem exam today was sheer joy:)))
i dont think i did like, a fantastic exemplary piece, but it should be pretty decent, and it sure felt good!!
i forced my mind to focus, stop thinking too intricately with my warped ludicrous sense of perfection, and just writeeeee... the words flowed, thank heavens for that.. ha ha
i even took a risk for lit, opting for a more difficult pair of poems to compare and contrast on, simply because i felt more strongly for the theme, mood and emotions that accompany them. beautiful, brooding pieces that i could relate to.. yknaoo..?
and i can do chem okeh!!! surprised myself lol butttt i do still think passing is a long shot.
the questions were managable, but gawd i still need to work on my time management and cut on silly mistakes such as missing out on one question during MCQ(in the earlier part worse omg) resulting in a shift in subsequent answerssszzxzx!!11!!! aughhhhh i dont know if i managed to rectify the wrongs tskkk...
shot myself in the foot. lol! but heck, i could do the questions:DDD
the joy is for myself hee

she's not here @

2:06 AM