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Sunday, November 30, 2008

it's annoying that, for some reason, my temper was hardwired to my tearducts.
a humiliating tendency..
it wasn't worth the fight and i knew it.
i just hoped you could've tried to understand.

nevermind. its the oestrogen!

automated ice- makers are the coolest things ever.

k i've got to go pong pong now so i can sleep because I WILL NOT BE LATE TMR KZ YOU.
meow.


she's not here @

12:32 AM

Thursday, November 27, 2008

ITS THE OESTROGEN

she's not here @

1:28 AM

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

i'll wait.

she's not here @

11:38 PM


too many people to ache over.
FUCK YOU ALL OKAY

swing the heartache
feel it inside out
when the wind cries
i'll say goodbye

crucify my love

she's not here @

11:03 PM


Sometimes the night still consumes me.
in the creeping silence, darkness seeps through the pores of my skin.
a soothing bleed.
a silent plea, unheard.
i am utterly alone, left to face myself, unable to hide.
it is not so much of loneliness now, but of anonymous irrational fears that suddenly arise.
for long moments i lay overwhelmed,
accentuated by the black, inscrutable night sky in all its majestic and enigmatic grandeur
till i am reminded of God's presence and i am ashamed.
dear heavy heart.
i cannot even escape in my dreams.

Oh the days are fine.
entirely preoccupied; so busy all the time, busy being in love.
the joy in living are simple pleasures derived from loving and being loved in return.
it is such a blessing to be alive, and dont forget to love!
Mornings are the loveliest.
The sun is barely out and time is out to charm you.
it is time to be alone.
breathe in the fresh moist air!
we all need some time on our own.

It shocked me when i realised that November is almost over.
my time doesn't feel maximised and well spent.
i imagined doing much, much more.
tell me i am not stuck in a rut.
i wanna get out there. see the world! explore! or at least not be forgotten by friends..
Our lives are rushing by like a runaway train, we have no time for hesitations.
i hesitated on going to China with my mother, and now that door is closed.
i am hesitating on learning a new language, soon it will be too late.
we have no time for hesitations.
dont put off till tomorrow what we can do today.
carpe diem!
seize the day!
or die regretting the time you lost.
why do i hesitate.

she's not here @

9:35 PM

Thursday, November 20, 2008

just got back from chalet a few hours ago, thought i should do an update!
chalet was okay, honestly, thank you everyone for paying so that we can have one.
loolzzz. anti-social girl's school girls. tsk,
leaves much much more to be desired.

and i am thankful to have such great friends like claudia and ling yu.
please listen to them, dear, because their concern is natural in loving me and protecting me.

i am fatttt! and getting fatter. zzomg. i got a shock when i finally realise how all these couch- potatoing and slacking around aren't doing me any good.
i shall go to the gym three mornings a week!
i shall eat less!
i shall..... do more sports!

Cedar musical is tomorrow. i fear for the reputation of my school.
haha please do us proud, people.
i'm bringing friendsss..
best not to expect too much, then maybe we can have a pleasant surprise :)

for those who do not already know, i'm working this saturday!
come visit me @ The Cathay, astons specialties restaurant 5-10pm.
i'll serve you :D

and yes chantal!!!! we shall go out and do nothing soonz.
man am i sad! my plans to get away (from singapore) this holiday has failed. T.T
i wanna travel! someone ship me away please.

i really hope i do well when we get back our results come 12 jan.
how frightening/

she's not here @

9:53 PM

Friday, November 14, 2008

HAHAHA BOY BOY SO CUTE


she's not here @

10:49 AM


HAHAHA i just read something about Mr Kang from annette's blog and it made me laugh like mad.
read this :D
-
mr kang: so, annette. is it easy to pick up guitar ?
me: why mr kang you wanna learn ah?
mk: no it's just that, my wife, she's complaining that i'm, uh..
me: talentless. [HAHA ok that was mean hor but i was kidding]

mk: unromantic.
cheryl: orh so you wanna seranade her lah hahaha
mk: aiya. it's so hard to be a husband these days.

me: mr kang next time my husband must be able to play piano.
jedi: my husband must be able to sing LIKE JAEJOONG
me: ohoh must be able to cook!
j&c: yahyah
mk: I CAN COOK!
me: but
mk: not that i wanna be your husband lah
me: no but you cant play piano.
mk: but i can do chemistry!
me: um... not part of the criteriaaaa.
-
ohoh! another mr kang story.
no really very funny one.
cos he was saying how he just got new korean neighbours 2 women and they're very pretty so his wife's like getting jealous.
chantal: mr kang, why you so never give your wife a sense of security one?
[then we told him to not look at the korean girls and like look at his wife.]

mk: i got! but then she say "why you stare at me?"
-
HAHAHA Mr Kang's damn funnyzzz

she's not here @

10:43 AM

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

i havent had a good sleep in ages.
cant breathe, you know
nice time to fall ill- chem was sucky, but i dont want to screw up bio too.
after tmr, i'm freee from studying in a long long time. :)

a friend is going through a rough patch now.
great timing for an emotional roller coaster ride.
i watched her- head bowed low, shoulders slumped, hugging a soft toy(with great sentimental value) tightly to her chest..
she walked in her circle of inner turmoil(which is quite palpable in fact), as her world collapses around her.
as we tried, and will keep trying to pick her up, i wonder if we are providing her with a tad of solace or further torment.
and all we could do was be there.

it was scary. o_o

she's not here @

8:55 PM

Friday, November 07, 2008

service at Heart of God Church last wednesday was awesome!
Nick Vujicic was the guest speaker, a man truly admirable.
he was born without limbs, but is able to live life beyond his abilities.
he can swim, play soccer, ride a horse.. because he lives not by sight but by faith.
God's grace is sufficient.
when you godisabled, Godisabled.

it is useless to be complete on the outside when you're broken on the inside.
Nick Vujicic is the exact opposite. he is complete.
sight will tell you that a man without limbs cannot walk nor swim.
but by faith, Nick can do all that and more.

*
When evening came, he(Jesus) was there alone, but the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.
During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, the were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.
But Jesus immediately said to them:" Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."
"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."
"Come," he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"
And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God."

~ Matthew 14:23-32
*

"Lord save me."
i honestly recommend everyone to attend this service, if Nick Vujicic comes to Singapore again. i think we can anticipate that, because he was eager to return to HoGC! :)
or you can purchase his dvd from cherie/ directly from HoGC.
take a look at his website: lifewithoutlimbs.org

tears are a language God understands.

she's not here @

7:37 PM

Monday, November 03, 2008

played my first few games of DotA today!
haha so i decided to pick up a mmorpg(mass multi-player online role-playing game or something like that) and chose dota, after watching zeno play.
it was fun! though i am a noob and we played against AIs...
HAHA got to get used to the keys(for spells).
my fingers were flying all over the keyboard!

went to the Marina Barrage after dinner with the family.
a dam across the sea, a reservoir in the city.
it was AWESOMENESS.
okeh my lousy vocab doesnt do justice to the spectecular landscape that hangs behind the bridge, somewhat like the photographs you see on postcards.
extremely picturesque; the night sky was lit with flecks of multi-coloured lights from the Singapore Flyer and various towers from the Central Business District.
and Motor GP is coming to Singapore.??
MAN, who said Singapore wasn't happening!

she's not here @

12:14 AM