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Sunday, April 25, 2010

how do i put this.
how do i begin to explain this..
i would like to find a picture to describe it but where does one go to find such pictures?
the numbness that flows with my blood and circulates throughout my body.
brain and head and heart and limbs
the fluid- my soul- leaking out of the windows of my wounds
i might go to flickr and search: wreckage, storm, chaos, bones or i don't know, blank..
or i could stay very very still, halt the movements of the muscles on my face and my lungs as it expands and my heart as it beats.
"throw your watches off the roof to cast your ballot for Eternity outside of Time"-
i'm talking about Ginsberg, of course.
who could string nice-looking words together just as well?
not me.
you could, almost, but i saw right through you after the fourth time so now there's nothing left but empty, empty words.
words as empty as my eyes and the sky and the space between your lips and your heart.
yes it took me so long. i'm scared, but who would hold me in their arms?
who could hold me in their arms
in my mind/heart it is a riot and also a stalemate.
be careful of that running thread along the seam
it's too late to trade for a new [body] now, live with it.

she's not here @

11:44 PM

Thursday, April 01, 2010

Cut the bonds with the moon
and let the dogs gather
Burn the gauze in the spoon
and suck the poison up
and bleed

Shut the door to the moon
and let the birds gather
Play no more with the fool
and let the souls wander
and bleed

from the soul

-
happy april shit's day

she's not here @

9:06 AM